Fitting In...

It is easy to believe that if people accept you and your lifestyle that equals belonging. However, this isn’t true. So many people feel the need to be liked or seek attention to be accepted. But accepted by who? Society? The pressure of being liked to fit in, when most don’t like themselves. Too busy trying to dress a certain way, changing your hair color be noticed or modifying your language/dialogue just to fit in. In today’s society, social media has us believing the more friends or followers the more we’re liked. You can have near 5000 friends on Facebook and less than 10% will “like“ something you post. For some reason with ease, you invited 5000 people in your world (just to be liked), but don’t have anything to promote—no business, no encouraging words just nothing. Maybe popularity is the focus... who knows? Or maybe becoming someone you need to be to be accepted. Most of these people you don’t even know—but who cares, 400 hundred people just liked your post...but 4600 didn’t. Hmmm, what does that say about you?

Acceptance-seeking can only be satisfied when the desired response of the people you are trying to fit-in with is achieved. The challenge that comes from acceptance-seeking is the emotional impact. One minute finding yourself excited by other’s acceptance and disappointed by a response you didn’t expect because of that anticipation of fitting in. So now you need to adjust to a situation and try to regain that acceptance you’re desiring.

Belonging is the journey. The greatest barrier to belonging is fitting in. Both men and women who have a sense of true belonging are people who have the courage to stand alone when needed. They are willing to maintain their integrity and risk disconnection in order to stand up for what they believe in. For those who struggle to seek the difference between fitting in and belonging are the one’s trying to fit in. Belonging doesn’t require us to change who we are, it requires us to be who we are. To know your worth is found in the Universe and not the opinion of others. The desire to be part of something larger than us. I will never fit in, that’s one of my best qualities! “Don’t get the popular circle confused with the winners circle” —Unknown