Honor Your Cry

There’s currently a severe storm. Raining, lightening and thundering at its best. In complete darkness, I closed my eyes; tears start to stream down my face. Is this fear or is this grief? Some say “be strong”; so we hold back our tears. Some say ”cry, let it out.” Ok, which one is it? Crying is most commonly defined as the action of shedding tears as an expression of distress or pain. It is also the expression of happiness, fear or anxiety. Many people, like myself, try to hide their tears. We criticize ourselves and think “I should be stronger.” “Maybe it’s my hormones.” “This isn’t the right time to cry.” “I don’t want to seem too emotional.” A bunch of excuses, right? Crying shouldn’t be a shameful act. We have somehow taught ourselves that expressing our emotions through tears is not okay in certain situations, especially in front of people. But why do we need to fight our tears in any situation? And when we do cry, why do we feel the need to cry alone? Crying should be beautiful even when it’s ugly. Suppressing emotions increases our stress level which causes problems like high blood pressure, lack of sleep, palpitations and irritability.

The fear of losing a parent. As much as you would like to be able to control everything, you just can't. It felt like sitting in a moving car knowing there were no brakes. No way to unlock the doors to free yourself. As the speed increases, you try to brace yourself, knowing the car will crash into a concrete wall. Then Boom! Sitting in disbelief and excruciating pain, I survived the crash, but someone didn’t. Crying when needed. Comforted by friends and family. We have no control over life's circumstances, but we always have control over how we cope and persevere. Learn to know in circumstances like this, crying is NOT a sign of weakness. In fact, I believe that crying is a sign of emotional strength and a way to heal. So the next time we feel the need to cry, do so—whenever, however and in front of whoever.

“My mind knows you’re in a better place where there is no pain. You are at peace. I understand that. I just wish I could explain that to my heart”

-Michelle Russell